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2010商务英语考试名师点评网友作文(3)

2010-07-08 来源:互联网 作者:第一考试网

2010商务英语考试名师点评网友作文(3)

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Formulate a smoking policy for your office which is fair to both smokers and nonsmokers. Write a 40-50 word memo informing all staff of the policy.

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老师提示:

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我们需要确定,如果我是公司职员,我要在这篇memo中获得什么信息?是不是要知道: #

1.新的吸烟政策从什么时候开始; #

2.吸烟区划定在什么地方? #

网友作文一:

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TO: All Employees #

FROM: CEO, Willan Smith #

SUBJECT: NEW SMOKING POLICY

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For all the employees, especially smokers,[1] plz be aware that our company's new smoking policy has been formulated as follow: A main smoking area's going to be restricted before Next MONDAY[2], anyone is not allowed to smoker in non-smoking zone even in the washing room.[3]

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Plz target the smoking and non-smoking area and stick to the company's new policy.[4] #

Thx.

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[1]去掉,抬头已经写过给所有的员工,所以直接从正文开始就行了,费这个事干什么? #

[2]时间不确切,最好是 from next Monday. Before 这个期限是什么时候?如果不能给出确切信息,就不要说,还不如换成具体的吸烟区域更好: be restricted to the room next to the toilet. #

[3]你经常在洗手间吸烟吗?或者你们公司有这样的同事?把这句话去掉。

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[4]添加:to ensure that it is fair to all of you.

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网友作文二: #

To: All staff #

From: Hope0068 #

Everybody know that smoking is dangerous for your health. And the The studies didn't just point to the ill effects of smoking on those who smoke--non-smokers, too. [1] Notice is hereby given that the smoking area is located in the special corner[2] of the first floor of this building. This come into force on[3] September 15th.

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Thanks. #

[1]Memo 的主要作用就是提醒同事们注意事项,这和吸烟有多有害不相干,去掉。改为:to assure working environment #

[2]一般的公司都应该给个room #

[3]from

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网友作文三:

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memorandum #

to : all the staff #

from : jeremyhttp://ks.exam8.com #

subjuect : new somking policy #

do you have a feeling that our office is surrounding by smog all the day, [1]so we will implemented a[2] new policy for somking ,from next week[3] ,we will open an area[4] for the smoking ,and other area is rescricting to smoke ,also there is a punishment when we find you smoke in these area [5]

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thank you

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[1]去掉

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[2]we will implement a #

[3]Next Monday #

[4]在哪里啊? #

[5]关于惩罚,最好不提。

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网友作文四: #

to: All Staffwww.wangxiao.cn #

from: Susuan Wu

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To creat a nonsmoking office room, we hope that smoking is forbidden in the work office from Sep.1st. Would you please enjoy your smoking in the Launch by closing the office door.

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Thank you for your coperation.

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整体很干脆,但是语气比较客气,而且没有看出是公司新政策的实行啊!

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网友作文五:

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To: All staff #

From: Sarah Buffay

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As you all know, there is an increasing dispute about smoking in the office. Now we'd like to formulate a policy both fair to smokers and nonsmokers: The vacant room 408 will be opened as "Smoking Room" from tomorrow. All smokers may go there within the time limitation from 9:00a.m. to 4:00p.m. But smokers are not allowed to smoke outside this room.[1]

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If you have any problems, please contact me. [2] #

[1]去掉。

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[2]这是信件的结尾,不是memo的,直接用thank you 就可以 #

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